Pick a weapon and a side

Denis O’Brien of Irish Water and Topaz nicely enough had €300,000,000 debt written off, O’Brien recently appointed the ex-chairman of AIB to the board of directors at Topaz where he’ll join Brian Mc’Cowen.
Denis O’Brien founded and owns the CommuniCorp (obviously bad guys) group which manages a portfolio of media and broadcasting-related companies in Ireland and eight other European countries. These include 98FM, Newstalk, Today FM, Highland Radio, Spin 1038 and Spin South West. He has a €600m stake (around 22%) in INM which owns the Evening Herald, Irish Independent, Sunday Independent, Sunday World and the Irish Daily Star, as well as 14 regional titles, two free newspapers, and a magazine. Communicorp also collaborates with TV3.
Denis O’Brien also “legally corrupted” Michael Lowry to secure Esat, a state asset, giving him a monopoly on telecommunications. O’Brien took up residence in Portugal to avoid a €55M euro Tax bill in Ireland.

O’Brien is a member of the fucking Bilderberg club, only google it if you don’t have ready access to a firearm.

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Not High Net Worth enough?

We are all individuals, but some are more High Net Worth than others this endows an individuality upon the consumer not found amongst the squeezed middle, the vulnerable or even the socially excluded who struggle when faced with the originality of the upper class.
Our own class prejudice is only a front just like your M&S catered marriage, in fact some of our best friends hail from the squeezed middle. In order to expedite conversations which touch on unemployment, welfare spongers or nurses selfish demands to a living wage on the back of their 72 hour shift we have included as part of our “It’s O.K to talk about class, seriously middle-class people we aren’t the source of your anxiety. What’s that? Oh a new iphone, feeling better?” Inter-class communications initiative. Do you find yourself about to jump into a conversation with the line “Welfare for people who need it is fine, but..” please, stop, drop and listen.

TeLeViSiOn

This weeks television, a manic regurgitation of press releases for exciting new shows such as “All up in the housing Department”, “What’s in the envelope?”, “Breakdance your way up a waiting list.” and “There is nothing in my pocket.” An envelope based slight of hand strategy game. As always we bring the obligatory “Another marginalised community exploitation doc, they probably use drugs”, with all the sensitivity of a  whisky-drunk sledgehammer. T.VD telling you who to love and who to blame.

Irish Water – It’s for your own good, now shut up and eat your cereal.

It was a brave decision to sell our public water service to private investors who will stimulate the economy by creating jobs for private security firms around the country. It’s also over time for Gardai as austerity policies have grown so unpopular that they now have to be policed. These investors, or brave job creators will monetise your public water supply and sell it back to you. This is for your own good. Money is moved upwards towards job creators, high net worth individuals, private business and away from you but don’t worry that money will create jobs and JobsBridge placements so you have the chance to earn it back. Irish water gives you the opportunity to shoulder more of Irelands debt burden than you already do and we probably didn’t need those schools anyway.
Remember that the economy needs to recover, it’s the public sector and the public who need to reform. We know because economists told us all about it, so no vested interests there. It was nurses and people on social welfare who crashed the economy so it’s only right that the public take up the challenge of an underfunded health and education system and just think of how jealous Maggie Thatcher would be at the job we have done in dismantling the welfare state, privatising our water supply just makes you even more profitable.
Irish Water has many positive knock-on effects for the economy. It makes Ireland an attractive place for multinationals to do business, giving them access to a labour market where wages have been driven down and offering a pool of free labour provided by the state. You may not be paid a living wage, or even at all but it will be for the benefit of the economy and what’s good for the economy is good for you. Now you may feel as though this is a socialist policy for business like when we bailed out the banks so you could pay for the mistakes of the financial sector. In this case we’d like to remind you that it’s economic recovery, public sector reform. The economy just needs a rest, it’s not like the financial sector is to blame for austerity measures. If you don’t like it, don’t start getting notions about having some sort of say in how things are run. Opportunities exist abroad and do pick up your mandatory 12.5% forehead tattoo on your way out, do it for brand Ireland.
You may feel some frustration as you already pay for water through taxation but these extra charges on top of the tax you already pay will make Ireland a more competitive place to do business, we provide a cheap and desperate workforce and we think that can be a good thing in itself. Privatizing our water supply is a good idea, we have always been at war with the social contract.